Two mugs of coffee.

Four phrases that strengthen a friendship

What is the difference between an acquaintance and a friend? Where is the line? What is the thing that happens? Is it magic? Can we fast track this alchemy?


Research shows that there are words, phrases, and questions that can forge human connection. Here are four:

“Thank you for _____________.” Being grateful. Everyone says be grateful, be mindful… blah blah blah. But how about being actually grateful for a specific thing? Let someone know you see them. Tell them which of their actions or words moved you, and what you did differently as a result of their impact. 

“I’ve never told anyone this before_________.”  Being vulnerable. Trusting someone else is a gift to them. Open up. Establish a deeper connection.

“You’re one of my fav new friends because__________.” Being explicit. Tell someone how much they mean to you. Give them the "when" of your appreciation--the moment you realized it, or the times when you depended on them. Being specific will reinforce your connection.

“Do you have 5 mins for a call?” Being present. Maybe a short piece of juicy gossip. Maybe you’re having a hard day and need a pep talk. Maybe your coffee kicked in and you’re craving a giggle. Or maybe it just occurred to you that David Beckham also poops daily and you just need to share that with someone. Get on the phone. Make that human connection.

And, of course, consider a gift for the simple reason that you want to say "Hey, I'm PRESENT for you."  

Wear it. Share it. Pass it on.  


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